Carter Manor is a serene, and yet, complicated place. Where there is regular teatime and the table is always set properly. Patricia, Francis, Harry, Madge and Sean reside at “The Manor” and enjoy and indulge in the offerings afforded daily. The live-in help ensures that all of the residents are well fed and cared for in the manner in which they are accustomed. Breakfast, lunch and dinners of lovely meats, breads, vegetables and fruits are on the menu…and, of course, delectable desserts as desired!
so, in my mind, i’ve written many articles with many topics, and yet, I see here that it is not true. i want to blog, to write about my many daily experiences. i want to have time to jot down these meanderings. and then i don’t. i don’t get to, that is.
have you seen the lion king? the circle of life thing, and all…? well, there’s no mystery in that scene. if you are still alive at 50 and are gifted with knowing others who are and still others who are close to twice that, then you know that not a hell of a lot is new. just renewed. we aren’t the inventors. we are the re-creators, the re-inventers. someone else most certainly did it first. but the revival, the reinvention is the new part especially for those who are unaware of the inception or introduction of whatever it is that they think is new. so, yea, right…that’s new…for anyone who is learning of anything for the first time. not to be undervalued.
It’s no secret that getting old is just a bitch. It’s ironic, too, because the mere fact that you have bypassed all the others who didn’t get to be old, you might be the only one left who IS old…like I said, it’s a bitch. You might not be able to see well, hear well, walk well, hell, do anything well, but you are the one. The one here, who is old, but alive.
Now, how you choose to be alive is an entirely different thing altogether. Being a 50 something with a 90 something mother, and who had in-laws in the same boat, I see this dilemma (or not) as a predicament of sorts. On the one hand, there’s the person who fights. The person who is just pretty pissed that age has robbed them of the faculties that they have relied on to survive and thrive. And then, there is the person who simply gave up because, well, they were old…
Either situation presents a dilemma. A situation of despair on one hand, and a situation of struggle on the other. If I were to choose, and I suspect I won’t have a choice due to genetics, I will be the struggler. I will be the one fighting to the end to preserve my intellect, my skills, my strength…whatever it is I value of my personal genius. And for that I am thankful.
There is great importance in being Patricia. She models the old we might all choose to be. What IS old after all…? That’s it?? ok…well, then why the hell are we so worried???
-having lived for a long time; no longer young.
-belonging only or chiefly to the past; former or previous.
Do you know the old saying
“You can’t fit a square peg into a round hole?”
It has many inferences.
And, it is important to be intuitive enough to know when things are being forced to happen and when you need to follow the lines in the sand and stay on track. The wind will continue to try to blow you backward when you know that you MUST follow the lines and move forward.
Because it the right thing to do.
Sometimes moving forward doesn’t mean something new. It may mean moving forward where you are in that place that is stagnant presently. As oppositional as that sounds, it makes perfect sense. Sometimes the universe sends us signals that we ignore. Why? Well, think of how many times you’ve abandoned a project because: A. you forgot about it. B. You got frustrated with it. C. You got bored of it. D. It was too hard…
Well, as with most things in this life, unresolved projects, situations, relationships, don’t go away.
So, here I am saying, “Okay, universe, help me finish this project. I’ve never given up. Oh, yes, I’ve lost hope/faith, whatever, soooo many times, but I’ve never given up. Now I need your help, your guidance to complete this project and to make it whole. To manifest its intentions to the fullest”
And, with that said. The intention is now in full motion.
Are YOU on board?
’tis true. we can dispute it, I know you do! but especially as women, we ARE our mothers. In ways that are unrecognized by ourselves and yet are prominent in our thoughts, mannerisms and behaviours. (and everyone else sees it!) We fight it. We deny it. We rebel against it. Why? We love our mothers and yet we strive to be the antithesis. A strange way to honor the most influential and important person in our lives.