If you only knew…

  • how your life would be different someday
  • that you might not appreciate the freedom you currently have until you don’t have it on a daily basis
  • that you will someday be “older”…your skin will change, your body will betray you, you may not sleep as well, you might not see or hear as well, and not remember as much
  • that you may be a caregiver for a family member
  • that you will learn to be alone well
  • that you will learn to deal with isolation
  • that self care is absolutely essential and primary to the care of your loved ones AND yourself
  • that you MUST continue as much of your ‘normal’ life while in your new role in life
  • that you MUST choose to be peaceful, happy and making choices that benefit your life…daily
  • that you matter and that others really do not know what you are dealing with in your life
  • that you do not always know what others are dealing with in their lives
  • that you are not the center of the universe…but…
  • that you DO matter
  • that your needs are important
  • be wise and choose wisely
  • that it’s okay to ask for help
  • that you can have a “you” day and you must…

And, it’s perfectly acceptable to say “no” to the excessive demands that prevail in the world around you because you simply cannot do everything all the time.

DO NOT allow others to predicate your existence, to usurp your joy, your energy, your self respect, your choices, to disrespect your choices, and not ask permission to invade your life.

Decades of life teaches you so many things, but you should not have to wait until you are almost dead to find these things out.

Own your livelihood, without possessing  and presenting entitlement.

Be humble and kind.

But, own yourself. And, if you’ve suffered the indecencies of others, stop it! now!

Be “mad as hell, and don’t take it any longer”

WORD

love you long time…

Do you have a situation that requires great decisions and reflections? A situation that feels like it will never be resolved and, more importantly, a situation that feels like it is uniquely yours that no one else could possibly relate to….???

Of course, you do. You are human. And it sucks a whole f’ing lot of the time. And you wonder…”Am I the only one who…(fill in the blank)?”  No, you definitely are not.

But, that doesn’t make your situation unimportant. In fact, it makes it perfectly relevant.

Why? because, believe it or not, we all relate. Someway, somehow. We are all dealing with S#$t, and we all have to go to work, take care of children, take care of our parents, do a job we hate, do chores we dislike and work with people we might not necessarily choose to work with….Damn it, just take care of f’ing everything!

IT. IS. HARD. PERIOD.

And, you know what? we have to keep doing it. Just like our great-grandparents did. Like our grandparents did. And, maybe our parents. Keeping a stiff upper lip isn’t necessarily bad.  Wearing our crap on our sleeves all the damn time, is heavy. It is counterproductive. It is useless. How does it aid in solving our personal crimes, our maladies, our misgivings? It doesn’t. Because, as my daughter might say, most people only care about themselves.

Does that hurt? Too bad. Because it’s true. Most people only think about how almost everything relates to them. Their pain, their joy, their heartaches, their victories. YUP. True. All of it true. We like to think that others are concerned with our well being. Some are, but most are not. We are all self-consumed.  The truth is difficult.

Take some time to love YOU, and you will be amazed at your ability to reach beyond yourself to love others and genuinely care about them. And, maybe, just maybe, all of that S#$T might be bearable…My experience is that, yes, being selfless yields positive results…Just saying…