love

vanished…

Posted on by cfox61

Dear everyone out there who is in a relationship, has been in a relationship or is currently getting out of a relationship,

Websters definition of a relationship goes like this:
1
: the state of being related or interrelated <studied the relationship between the variables
2
: the relation connecting or binding participants in a relationship: such as
a : kinship
b : a specific instance or type of kinship
3
a : a state of affairs existing between those having relations or dealings <had a good relationship with his family
b : a romantic or passionate attachment

Whether you are in a platonic relationship or a romantic one, I implore you to observe some obvious civilities in assuming this kinship and it’s dismissal if it is the case.

“Ghosting”, the new way to exit a relationship, is, above all, disrespectful.

Equally justifiable definitions include cowardly, cruel, painful, sad, lazy, selfish, unkind and many, many other interpretations.

In this current world of complicit unrest and division, it is my concern that it has become too easy to just step away from unpleasant situations and/or not address them with courtesy.

What happened to being human and respecting each other. “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”.  Wasn’t that what we learned as children?  What happened to self respect, dignity and truth? What happenend to compassion, appreciation, and recognition of another person’s feelings?  Where have we gone wrong in teaching sensitivity?

From experience, I know that the pain incurred from this type of silent assault is deep.  “Walk a mile in my shoes…” “See how it feels when the shoe is on the other foot…”.  Fear of rejection exists for both parties. Even if you are the rejector. But, for god’s sake, be real, be true and be mature. 

One last word…BOO!

 

 

Closure

Posted on by cfox61

Closure or need for closure (NFC) are psychological terms that describe an individual’s desire for a firm answer to a question and an aversion toward ambiguity.

‘nuf said.

over and out.

Where do I begin…?

Posted on by cfox61

In the present, that’s where.

Now. Here. Right now as a matter of fact.

Each moment, each minute, each hour, each day… is the beginning.                                      The beginning of each new action, feeling, emotion and miracle of our life.                          We choose our destiny and who we are and who we become. Coincidence is actually fate.

It is true that we repeat our inconsequential and disappointing moments because we have not learned what we need to know yet. We relive these times until we get it “more right”.

Resolve. yes. I accept resolve. I am learning.I WILL continue to learn. I WILL get it right. And that is because I choose to be true. Be True. A powerful message that I accepted in 1980 and have lost touch with off and on over the years. My mantra for 2017.

BE TRUE.

Success…it’s all relative…

Posted on by cfox61

Tonight I want to talk about success. Not as it relates to monetary acquisition but more as it relates to emotional and spiritual acquisition.

So, you ask ? “what exactly do you mean?”

Personal success for me has been centered around the intangible gratification of my artistic contributions. Yes, I have been paid…sporadically and inconsistently for my work. But, that has been inconsequential to my well being. I have certainly, and morosely, over obsessed about the lack of financial infusion to my bank accounts, but that has not pre determined my dedication to the project at hand. Each year that passes,  I consider the fact that I have not contributed to a 401(k) or some other pre-destined retirement plan. I wonder if I should be really worried…and then, I forget that I thought about it at all.

My point is that success is determined by those who own it.

I own it.

Do you?

It’s real…

Posted on by cfox61

So, being real, is REALLY hard…at least for some people. It means vulnerability, exposure, truth.

If we are able to maintain a facade of strength, resistance, and avoidance…maybe, just maybe, we can avoid ourselves.

 

duplicity

Posted on by cfox61

I know. I am a quintessential vocabularian. It’s my curse.

But I am currently hung up on this concept. Of a sene of deception. The sense of betrayal is prevalent and I smell its lack of loyalty in my midst. I am not comfortable with its presence. Although the unearthing of its truth is painful, I also relish in its exposure.

Bring it on!

 

Table for one, please!

Posted on by cfox61

As I get closer to the proverbial empty nest, I am often asked “Are you worried about being alone or lonely?”

Frankly, that has never entered my mind. Should it? I wonder…

And, then I ponder the definitions of those 2 words.

Alone, I am. By choice. Often. By circumstance.

Lonely, I am not. By Choice. Not often. By Accident.

a·lone
adjective & adverb
1.
having no one else present; on one’s own.
synonyms: by oneself, on one’s own, all alone, solitary, single, singly, solo, solus; More
antonyms: with others, accompanied
without others’ help or participation; single-handed.

having no companions in a particular position or course of action.
“they were not alone in dissenting from the advice”
2.
indicating that something is confined to the specified subject or recipient.
“we agreed to set up such a test for him alone”

lone·ly

adjective
sad because one has no friends or company.
“lonely old people whose families do not care for them”
synonyms: isolated, alone, lonesome, friendless, with no one to turn to, forsaken, abandoned, rejected, unloved, unwanted, outcast; More
antonyms: popular
without companions; solitary.
“passing long lonely hours looking onto the street”
synonyms: solitary, unaccompanied, lone, by oneself/itself, companionless
“the lonely life of a writer”
(of a place) unfrequented and remote.
“a lonely stretch of country lane”
synonyms: deserted, uninhabited, unfrequented, unpopulated, desolate, isolated, remote, out of the way, secluded, off the beaten track/path, in the back of beyond, godforsaken; informalin the middle of nowhere
“a lonely road”